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BUCHANAN GIVES SURPRISE ENDORSEMENT TO SHARPTON FOR PRESIDENT
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BROWNSVILLE, TX – Die-hard conservative and xenophobe, Pat Buchanan, who usually writes in a vote for himself for President, has taken a new tack in his long campaign to keep foreigners
out of America.
Feeling abandoned by President Bush, who recently announced what appears to be a more-open immigration policy for Mexican workers, Buchanan is now leading a “Conservatives for Sharpton” campaign, figuring that, if Rev. Al Sharpton is elected President, no one will be clamoring to get into America.
“I don’t usually advocate voting for black people,” Buchanan conceded, “but these are desperate times. Only if Al Sharpton is elected President can we expect things to get so bad that foreigners will stop trying to come to America. Of course, a bunch of white people might flee in the meantime, but I have to hope our next President would let them back in.”
Other conservatives said they could not conceive of voting for Sharpton even if it would reverse the tide of immigration, with at least one conservative describing Buchanan’s endorsement of Sharpton as “hair raising.”
“No pun intended,” he added.
The White House had no official comment on Buchanan’s decision to support Sharpton for President, but laughter could be heard coming from White House political director Karl Rove’s office for several hours following Buchanan’s announcement.
At last report, Sharpton was holed up in his Ritz Carlton “campaign office” reviewing financial records to make sure campaign funds were not being misspent.
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