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SOURCES SAY BUSH PROPOSED WMD 'LOANER' PROGRAM
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WASHINGTON, DC – Defense Department sources today revealed that President Bush secretly proposed loaning weapons of mass destruction (WMD) to Syria in advance of a possible future U.S. invasion of that nation. The President reportedly also considered extending the program to Iran.
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'Loaner' WMD readied for delivery by the
Bush Administration
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“We just don’t want to get caught lying again,” said a high ranking White House official, “If we loan some WMD to Syria, we know we’ll find WMD after the war. Its that simple.”
“But what if Syria just sells the WMD or smuggles the weapons out of the country before our troops can find them again?” a reporter asked the White House official.
“Aaahhh,” the official hesitated, “I’ll, uh, get back to you on that one.”
With word of the proposed “loaner” program having leaked to the media, the concept has drawn considerable fire from anti-terrorism officials.
Breaking rank with the White House, Attorney General Ashcroft explained his concerns to reporters, saying: “You couldn’t pay me to give a Muslim a gun before I shot him. What I’d do is shoot him first and then give him the gun.”
“You’re not going to print this are you?” Ashcroft added.
In public statements following the wave of criticism, President Bush appeared to back away from the plan, telling reporters “we have enough evidence as it is to prove Syria and Iran have attempted to acquire WMD.” Asked what evidence he had, the President responded: “Well, for one thing, we have learned both Syria and Iran had some involvement with a WMD ‘loaner’ program. The thought of them having WMD, even ‘loaners,’ now that’s scary stuff.”
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